Insights
May 30, 2018

The 4 Ways to Self-Reflect On Your Own Emotional Intelligence


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Have you heard of Emotional Intelligence?

We all have it to some degree, and we all use it every single day of our lives.

It can be a very useful skill to have, both in our professional and personal lives, however, to be able to develop it, you must be able to work upward from a strong foundation, and that begins with inward self-reflection.

In this Insight article, I will walk you through the 4 ways you can begin to identify your own level of Emotional Intelligence, so you can harness it and help develop its potential.

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Sometimes abbreviated to EI, Emotional Intelligence is your ability to identify and manage your own emotions and adapt to those of people around you.

When you understand what and why you’re feeling the way you do, you become more aware of your actions and can control your behaviour more effectively. This emotional consciousness allows you to grow as a person and develop a deeper appreciation of who you are and who you interact with, so you are able to nurture stronger relationships.

You can read more in my article, EI is the new Black! Emotional Intelligence and the Impact on Your Career.

Whether or not this is a new concept to you, following these 4 simple tips can be a useful step on your journey toward discovering more about yourself and your emotional intelligence.

1. Be more mindful of how you feel

In today’s manic life, we rush around from place to place and our emotions don’t even get a second thought. They are still there, but our almighty to-do lists seem to be all that matters.

From today onward, practise taking time out two or three times a day, to stop for a few seconds, take a few breaths and ask yourself how you feel. Consider why you feel this way and the impact it’s having on both yourself and those around you.

Related Reading  Why emotional quotient matters to you?

Are you feeling happy? Content? Satisfied? Angry? Anxious?
Why? Is it something lingering over from last night? An upcoming presentation? A promotion? A working lunch at your favourite restaurant?

You will immediately realise how much you’ve been missing out on, and what your body has been trying to express. Taking this precious time to do an emotion check will reconnect you with inner sensations and help you better appreciate the context of why you feel the way you do.

Continuing to do this every day will help you balance out your self-awareness and start you on the path to being able to take more control.

2. Observe your behaviour

Once you have begun to consider your emotions, the next step is to reflect on your different behaviours throughout the day in response to them.

The way we act is a physical manifestation of the way we feel. For example, anxiety may make you fidget, or anger may cause you to lash out at an innocent person.

Developing your emotional intelligence is as much about being able to manage your associated behaviour as it is observing your emotional experiences.

3. Question your views 

The digital world today has made everyone’s opinions very public and unavoidable, which can have a significant impact on our own true feelings.

For example, being always surrounded by similar people can put you in a group-think situation, where your thoughts are always reinforced by those around you, leaving you close-minded and cut off.

Take the time to expand your horizons and consider that there’s always another side to every story. Challenge your preconceived notions and force yourself out of your thought comfort zone. Be open to another person’s journey.

This will help open your mind and be more in tune with people outside of your usual circle, as well as help you gain a better perspective on things and be open to new ideas.

Related Reading  EI is the new Black! Emotional Intelligence and the Impact on Your Career

4. Take responsibility for your emotions  

The three above factors, emotions, behaviour and opinions, all stem directly from you and you alone. Sure, they are affected by outside influences, but they’re still part of you.

Don’t disassociate yourself from them or pass the blame. Instead, learn to accept responsibility.

When you begin to take ownership of your emotions and your actions, you will realise how in control you actually are, and how to channel every part of yourself to become a better person.

When you begin to take ownership of your emotions and your actions, you will realise how in control you actually are, and how to channel every part of yourself to become a better person

Emotional Intelligence is an ongoing and worthwhile journey

Emotional Intelligence isn’t something that you can develop overnight. It’s something we all have. It’s closely aligned to personality, in that it’s malleable at an early age but with coaching and self-awareness, it can be developed. EI is a deep and powerful connection to both yourself and those around you, which takes time to develop, and then continual improvement to nurture.

It is definitely worth every effort you invest in it. Being able to read people’s emotional states and adapting your behaviour accordingly by harnessing your emotions will get you very far in life, both at work and personally.

How can Lifeology Help You?

Having years of experience assisting people to understand and enhance their Emotional Intelligence, I have helped many people discover their true potential in both their working and personal lives.

Although our Emotional Intelligence becomes more ‘set in’ with age, it is malleable and, along with self-awareness and coaching, can be focused on and enhanced in an effective way, to improve career growth and success.

Feel free to contact me to find out how!

For more information, contact Kerryn at [email protected] to unlock your emotional potential today.

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